Navigating the in-between

An autoethnographic study of an international graduate student in the U.S.

Abstract

International student scholarship largely relies on quantitative studies that, while useful, often flatten cultural contexts and overlook researcher subjectivity. Dervin (2011) argues that quantitative studies of international student experience remain at the surface of the conversation and urges researchers to acknowledge their biases in data analysis by being more self-reflexive and admitting their subjectivity. These pleas for more self-reflexive approaches challenge traditional methods that prioritize objectivity (Ellis & Bochner, 2006). This research study responds to Dervin’s plea by employing autoethnography, a method rooted in lived experience and personal narrative. Using analytical vignettes and narratives, I examine my lived experience as a Kosovar international graduate student in the United States. My approach highlights the complexity of cultural adjustment, academic struggle, and identity negotiation and expands the body of international student scholarship by foregrounding the marginalized voices of non-Western international students in the U.S. Some interconnected themes that emerged from my analytical vignettes included otherness, silence, loneliness, financial precarity, international student identity, and resistance to cultural erasure. The findings illustrate how students from developing and post-conflict nations navigate complex processes of cultural adjustment, linguistic insecurity, belonging, and identity negotiation while confronting structural inequities that often remain invisible within higher education institutions.